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 There are an incredible number of games on the internet, and not very many of them are very good. In fact, most people would rather light their pants on fire than play a flash game. There are several gems out there, however, and this week I'm bringing you a few of my favorites. Each game has a link to either play or download the software in question.
Note: I'm not covering mods or copies of other games. Don't mention them in the comments, because I'll just delete your nonsense :)
#5: Echoes
Download "Echoes" here!
Combine Asteroids, Geometry Wars and some game involving shields and this is basically what you get. You control your ship using the mouse, and the ship is constantly shooting in one direction. You can change which direction the ship is shooting by tapping the respective WASD buttons.
Giant meteors are hurtling at your ship constantly, and as in Asteroids, bigger ones break into smaller ones after you shoot them. As you progress, eventually little blue enemies and waves of black holes, red ships in snake-like formations, and gigantic blue enemies rain down on you like heart conditions after a hotdog eating contest. You don’t have lives or bombs, but a health bar and a shield surrounding your ship that gets smaller with successive hits, eventually resulting in your horrible, flaming death. I know, it sounds like a blast of fun and excitement! And it is!
Pros:
Just as fun as Geometry Wars, arguably
Fun graphics and special effects
Good variety of modes
Small download size
Cons:
May make your eyes bleed
Extremely long start-up time when loading the game
#4: Stick Arena
Play "Stick Arena" here!
I want this game to come to WiiWare like a fat boy wants liposuction. The game is an online, multiplayer, top-down shooter. It’s quick and painless to join a room and once you do you’ll be thrown into a sort of real-time chess match involving close-range, long-range, and mid-range weapons, where your strategy will alter drastically depending on what weapon you have. The shotgun kills in three hits, but reloading is slow so every shot counts. The AK47 is fast and deadly but you have to be able to strafe around return fire while still keeping a steady aim on spastic opponents. The sledgehammer kills in one hit, but the range is terrible and the attack time is slow, so you’ll have to use walls to separate you from others so you can jump out and surprise them. You really have to play the game for yourself to appreciate it, but I maintain that should it be released on WiiWare, it would be the greatest game for that service.
Pros:
Good variety of maps
Overall fantastic gameplay
Easy account management
Fun rewards system for doing well
Cons:
Community riddled with hackers that ruin matches
30 Second ads in between matches
#3: You Found the Grappling Hook!
Download "You Found the Grappling Hook!" here!
Okay, so first off, this game is butt ugly. It looks like an Atari 2600 had a retarded baby with the original Pong machine and someone made this game for that system. Now, with THAT out of the way, I’ve got to praise this game for its originality. You’re some kind of pixel person or something, and you can shoot a grappling hook. Not very surprising, of course, but the swing mechanics are pretty fun once you get used to them, and you’ll have plenty of chances since you have unlimited lives (THANK YOU). Now you’ll think that all this game is about is trying to get to the end, but you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the “plot twist” at what you’d think is the end of the game. I won’t spoil it any further. Play this junk.
Pros:
Awesome, retro feel
Cool twist to the gameplay at about the halfway point
Unlimited lives
Cons:
Controls are unforgiving
#2: N
Download "N" here!
You already know what this is. For the love of George Foreman’s nineteen and a half children, please don’t download the 360 version of this game. There’s a free version online with well over 500 fantastic levels. I seriously think that this is the most hardcore gamer’s platforming game ever created. The physics are great, and the sense of accomplishment you’ll get from beating the levels (once the game gets warmed up) is immense. I won’t say any more. Just go download it.
Pros:
500 Levels
Thousands of user-created levels available for download
The best physics engine in any 2D game EVER.
Cons:
Really, really hard.
#1: You Have To Burn The Rope
Play "You Have To Burn The Rope" here!
There really isn’t much to say about this game, as it’s only about 45 seconds long. I think it may be the best 45 seconds of my gaming life, however, and the end song is arguably better than Portal’s “Stay Alive”. This is another “see-for-yourself” sort of game. All I can say is that after you play it, you’ll agree that anyone who hasn’t isn’t a real gamer. No joke.
Pros:
Awesome
Cons:
None
So there's the list. If you only play one, let it be the last. But you're still a jerk if you don't play all of them. No pressure. Name some other games that I might not have played myself using the comment system below.
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